day 1: vegan

After too many documentaries, I've decided to go vegan. Okay, so the documentaries didn't have everything to do with my decision. Let's just say I am tired of being unconscious of what I'm putting into my mouth. I'll never ever be preachy or condemning. I'll never ever be disgusted by meat. Whether the meat is local, farm-raised, factory processed, or from a different country, it deserves respect. Whether it was purchased at Publix, Walmart, New Leaf or Whole Foods, it deserves respect. Because that meat was once a sentient being. No matter what life it lived, respect must be given.

I realized yesterday that I wasn't giving meat the respect it deserves. Therefore, I am going vegan. I guess I could say I'm a circumstantial vegan. I'll eat eggs if they come from chickens at a friends house, or drink milk if it comes from a local farm, or even eat meat and fish if someone I know shot/caught and cleaned the animal themselves. I was explaining this to my friend Caitlin who is herself a vegetarian. She understood and summed up my babbling: "So, you just want to be conscious of where it's coming from." Yes.

So no more foods with trace amounts of dairy, or pulled pork tacos, or ice cream, or sashimi, or sour cream. No more. I'll never be able to go to a restaurant again without annoying a friend, a server, or the kitchen staff. Anthony Bourdain would laugh in my face. Vegan, ha! And if that happened I would definitely be heartbroken, because he is like the uncle I always wanted. Brash, sarcastic, and a goddamn amazing chef.

Anyways, I don't really want this blog to be another chronicle of someones decision to go "veg" or only drink smoothies, or work out every day until they've lost 10 pounds. It's not going to be that. It's going to be a place where I can say, "Why does Tofutti sour cream taste like cardboard?!" And then I will realize that I said Tofutti and sour cream in the same sentence, and everything will make sense.

I am completely aware of the health complications of going vegan. As a depressed young adult, with a mild case of hypoglycemia and low amounts of iron, I really need to be careful. I'll be popping multi-vitamins and Wellness Formula capsules like nobody's business. I'll become a junkie and someone will have to ween me off with gummy vitamins. But I'll say "Noooo! Gummies sometimes contain gelatin which comes from animal prod--" and someone will stuff my mouth with more gummies and say "EAT DAMMIT! EAT OR YOU'LL DIE". Hopefully this will not happen.